Mom Words

Since becoming a parent, do you ever think about the random words that come out of your mouth and somehow manage to form a sentence? Today, as I was talking to the children, I did just that. Being a mom means a complete change in your vocabulary. Sometimes, it's a simple change. What used to be a bathroom is now a potty, and instead of discussions about current events, you talk to your peers about Dora's latest mission. Sometimes though, it's a more complex combination of words that once said, you stop for a minute and think to yourself ..."did I seriously just say that?" Never, in my wildest dreams, had I ever imagined the words "Well Kaelyn, your DS doesn't work because you peed on it" coming out of my mouth in that order. Four other random mom word combinations said today:

"Girls, I'm not kidding, tell me where you put the butter"


"Well that makes sense, of course you hid the butter in your favorite hiding spot next to the empty Gatorade bottle, pants, and candy wrappers."


"I'm sorry Bryce, but scotch tape isn't going to fix your trophy."


And lastly, "Seriously, did I just hot glue that feather to the carpet?"

I sleep in the 1' x 1' square in the middle.




I guess that's better than sleeping with Addison's foot in my face.

So... I noticed that a tassel was missing from my kitchen valance.

And then I found this under the kitchen table.



Interesting.

This is Why We Don't Have Nice Things

If you know us, then you know that complete chaos is a regular occurrence in our household. This is partly because we put way too much on our plate, but mostly because we're all slightly, or more than slightly (Adam) crazy. Whenever chaos occurs, I try to grab my camera and snap some evidence. Sometimes I fail. A couple days ago, we had a canoe strapped to the top of our rented minivan, and I'm still kicking myself for not getting a picture of Adam not only trying to untangle it, but trying to untangle it in the rain. Sometimes, however, I succeed. For instance:

Although my couch is red, it's not quite the same color red as the wine Addison dumped all over it.

Addison had her new Sketcher light up shoes all of about 2 days before Kaelyn threw one over the fence. Luckily, they didn’t turn their sprinklers on before we got it back.

The terrible twosome often like to hide things so they can come back to them when it's convenient. And by convenient, I mean a time when I'm not paying attention. This was found by grandma under the upstairs couch.



The reason she found it? Addison, never guessing that grandma would tell on her, started eating it right infront of her.



Finding the girls stuffing sweets in their mouth happens quite often. Once, when I went to get them out of bed, I found them both eating Oreos. When they refused to tell me where they were hidden, I had to go looking. I found them hidden under a pair of pants in Kaelyn's dresser. Another time, while I was cooking dinner, they smuggled a box of capri suns off the counter top and into their bedroom. The next morning, I found 10 empty juice boxes. Here's Addison eating candy under the dining room table on a random morning. Let's hope my little addicts never have a drug problem!



Last year, Kaelyn and Addison sold cookie dough for a dance fundraiser. While I was talking to a salesman at the front door, they got out the mix, ate whatever chocolate chips that they could, and spread the dry powder all over their legs. Why? I'm not sure. At least it was grandma's cookie dough so we didn't have to offer any refunds.



While the kids were gone at my parent's house for a week this summer, I did a lot of cleaning. I also found a lot of marker in a lot of random places. Like behind the door in the playroom.



This one was also in the playroom, behind the toy box.



This one was found upstairs in the man room, right next to the red wine stains on the wall where Kaelyn karate chopped my mom's wine glass.



And this one was in my closet, behind my shoes. Seriously, do these kids have any supervision?



When they're not coloring on walls, they are coloring on the dog.



And of course, we can't forget the person that now sleeps with Adam and me on our favorite bamboo sheets.



Bryce, for the most part, is REALLY good, like he always has been. Occasionally, however, there's a sword fight or two in the backyard.

And this was taken by a random wedding guest BEFORE he had to walk down the aisle.



Obviously, his dad was watching him.

And this is why we don't have nice things!